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Jag funderar mycket på det här med attraktionslagen och varför man har så lätt att attrahera vissa saker medan annat sitter som berget. Parkeringsplatser kändes som ett mirakel när jag började med det. Nu funkar det som gott som alltid och jag har nästan börjat ta det för givet. 

En nyckel som jag funnit användbar är "fuck it" metoden. Äh, det finns ingen sån metod, jag bara hittade på den nu. Men den beskriver ganska bra hur det (ofta) går att få in saker när man hittar den där energin där man inte bryr sig om man får det eller inte. Man liksom "Å vad skoj det vore med en ny soffa, men fuck it jag gillar den jag har".

Den är ganska svår att framkalla medvetet, funkar ofta bäst när man faktiskt känner så naturligt. Poff så knackar någon på dörren och erbjuder den där soffan som man egentligen ville ha.

Så jag antar att trixet är att hitta den känslan/energin i det som även jag även desperat vill ha. Jag övar mig ofta. Ibland funkar det, ibland inte.

Ett annat hinder som jag ofta stöter på, och här får man verkligen rannsaka sig själv, är jantelagen. Man kan också kalla det för "det som man är uppvuxen med att tro är möjligt och det som bara är till för andra". Ett annat uttryck är "inte behöver väl jag". Eller bara helt enkelt "ska vi verkligen önska oss mer prylar i detta konsumtionssamhälle?". Känner ni igen det? Anar ni vart jag vill komma? Jag låter bli att kommentera detta. Var och en får bestämma vad som är ok för en själv.

Ett exempel på detta är att jag alltid önskat att få flyga i första klass. Jag vet, det är så himla fel i dessa tider och det är så onödigt och så himla löjligt. Fel! Det är precis detta som är hindret. Jag lägger en massa dömande kring min önskan. Strunt samma vilken önskan jag har. Jag har en önskan punkt slut. När jag vågar uttrycka min önskan i min bekantskapskrets så får jag ofta höra att "gud va onödigt att lägga pengar på sånt" eller bara blickar som säger "vem tror hon att hon är".

Allt det här sammantaget hindrar mig förstås.

Men det kan vara annat också. Jag har i flera år önskat att få resa till Thailand med mina barn men det har helt legat utanför min budget. I flera år har jag önskat och önskat. Men här hindrar jag mig själv genom att tro att det inte är möjligt. Jag har ju bara de pengar jag har liksom (tänker jag och glömmer bort att jag ska fokusera på vadet och inte huret). Ja sen kan man ju även här tillägga att det är helt "fel" tider att flyga långflyg just nu.

Nånstans har jag i allt detta landat i att Fuck-it metoden funkar bäst. Kan man bara vidga sina vyer, ta bort jantelagen. Och då menar jag din egen jantelag. Där ingår mitt eget dömande.

I min 10 minuter gamla Fuck-it metod har jag tagit fram ett verktyg. Kanske hjälper den dig. Kolla bilden och se om du kan få bukt med dina hinder. Svara på frågorna: vad har du just nu, vad du får (dvs tror är möjligt), vad du kanske kan få vissa fall, vad du tycker är onåbart och vad som skulle kunna vara helt omöjligt men något du ändå alltid drömt om. Som till exempel att bli osynlig. På det här viset får du lite koll på var dina hinder ligger och kan du tänkas flytta dem nedåt i bilden till en ring längre närmare där du befinner dig nu?

1. Stop postponing things - I'm not talking about planning and waiting for timing and that kinda stuff. I mean when you simply put off, put off, put off and put off. They only result in that doing is that you waste energy. And guess who's energy you're waisting? Yours.

2. Stop avoiding things
Its similar to number one but slightly different. You know some things need to be done and in your head you make up excuses as to why you don't need to do them. We all have problems. But the sooner you deal with them the sooner you feel better. Sometimes you even need to adjust to others.

3. Stop helping people
Ok lets be honest, helping is wonderful, it makes you feel important, needed and it actually gives you some sort of power - over others that is. I am not talking about the kind of help where we do stuff that the other person can't or won't do and both parties feel good about it. I mean when you take power away from the other person. He or she is fully capable. Let her bring her own power back into her life by helping her helping herself.

4 Stop avoid losing
We are all losers at some stage. Loosing is the way we learn, about our limits, about our needs and wants and about what we actually want in life. Behind every success there are trillions of mistakes being done. And when you hit your head against the wall. Get up strong and put on a helmet next time. Be a loser! :)

5. Stop hanging out with energy waste
Do you have people in your life that give you headaches? Do you have people who every time you see them on the display you get tummy aches? Get rid of them! The only thing they add to your life is just that: tummy ache. And you don't need it. There are almost 8 billion people on this earth and life is short! Go shopping for new energy givers and add them to your circle.

6 Stop wearing that martyr crown
In Sweden we the call martyr crown 'offerkofta'. Translated it's victims cardigan. It's a nasty piece of clothing to wear. It only drains you and hey, no it is not the governments fault, or your grandma's or your boyfriend's. You are the king in your kingdom - it's your fault! Once again - take power over your kingdom and run it!

7. Stop clinging to the past
Life is like a book, you can't read the next chapter if you keep reading the past. Do you want to continue living in misery. Lets turn the leaf and see what's next!

8. Stop worrying
Stop worrying - unless you want to lose weight that is. You can worry about a thousand little things that will never happen or you can deal with the one that actually does happen. It's your choice. If you focus on real problems and try and solve them - then you can make a difference.

Blir du stressad av att du borde leva din dröm? 

Har du gått en yogautbildning, spelat in meditationer i studio, gått en terapiutbildning eller pluggat till hälsocoach och insett att du aldrig kommer att kunna leva på det? Om du inte tycker att 7 000 kr i månaden är en bra bruttolön vill säga.

Kanske har du tagit tjänstledigt från jobbet för att skriva en bok men inser efter sex månader att du bara kommit till kapitel 2. Har du lyckats skriva färdigt den kanske du fått fler nekanden från bokförlag än du nånsin fått från jobbansökningar i hela ditt liv?

Har du investerat i en väglednings-, rikedoms- eller hållbarhets coach och ser färre resultat än du gjorde i din senaste anställning?

Har du gått kurser som heter något i linje med: ”Lev din dröm”, ”Hitta din sanna potential” eller ”Bli den du är” och inser att efteråt är du bara mer förvirrad än innan. Kanske till och med mer deprimerad. Den skulle ju leda till att du skulle starta de där kurserna för människor som brinner för samma sak som du. Men inser att ingen har råd att gå dina kurser. Det är svårt att jaga folk.

Kanske har du sagt upp dig och allt kändes fantastiskt. Du blev äntligen fri. Nu ska det ske, det där som du väntat på hela livet. Bara du har tillräckligt med tillit och har mediterat tillräckligt många gånger så kommer lösningen som en tanke. Du får flow och allt kommer i din väg så som en räkmacka.

Men istället kommer räkning efter räkning och plötsligt stängs elen av.

Yogisarna som du gick utbildning med verkar ju ha det så bra. De får uppdrag efter uppdrag medan du står och stampar i en liten källarlokal i den lokala hembygdsföreningen och i bästa fall dyker de tre glada tanterna upp som alltid är så trogna. Men som du bjuder på klassen för du är så snäll och de är ju så himla trevliga. Så du går back på hyran och hoppas att nästa gång. Då kommer de strömma in.

Så du går en sociala medier kurs och börjar blogga, lägger ut inlägg efter inlägg och stressen ökar för du har så många kanaler som ska hållas levande så att alla ser vilken fin yta du har och så att de ska vilja komma på dina mindfulnesskurser eller anmäla sig till åtminstone en halvtimmes gratis coaching. Bara du får visa vad du går för. Men alla som du lyckas boka upp kommer inte på någon fler session.

Du följer några digitala nomader i sociala medier och inspireras av hur de reser runt jorden och det verkar gå så bra för dem. De coachar online och har kurser i ”skapa en online kurs”, ”lev på raw food” och ”så blir du en digital nomad”. Ja kanske ett fåtal lyckas. Men hur överlever de andra på 4 300kr i månaden? Kanske om man tältar och plockar blåbär. Det är ju förvisso ekologiskt och raw food. Men det var ju inte så du hade tänkt.

Eller kanske är det så att du får några kunder, de ökar till och med på med tiden. Men bara en kort period. Sen tar de slut. Och det lilla hoppet du lyckades frammana är nu om möjligt ännu längre ned i det svarta hålet.

Så vad är lösningen då? Ska vi alla ta en trygg anställning och aldrig ägna oss åt det vi verkligen vill? Sälja vår själ till kapitalismen?

En klok människa sa till mig: ”försök hitta känslan i det som du brinner för och se om du kan hitta en inkomstbringande verksamhet som skapar den känslan. Även om du älskar att fotografera, är det verkligen fotograferingen som är grejen, eller är det att du älskar människor, att du gillar att locka fram något i människor. Om du älskar leda meditationer, vad är det i det som du gillar? Är det att leda grupper? Kan du hitta den känslan i något som faktiskt gör att du kan leva ett bra liv och som betalar dina räkningar?”

Det behöver inte heller vara så svartvitt. Leva dröm eller leva mardröm. Varför inte leva den stora drömmen på helger och kvällar och på dagarna lever du en dröm som är lite mindre stark men som betalar väl. 

Investera är också ett alternativ, hitta sätt att få ditt kapital att växa på sidan om så att du på sikt kan gå ned i tid från en anställning eller företagande. Man kan börja smått. Kanske behöver du gå några kurser. Men kurser är inte av ondo. Det är intentionen med kursen och förväntningarna på vad kursen ska ge som kan göra dig bitter och besviken. Om förväntningarna är för höga vill säga. Det finns många fantastiska kurser som gör att du växer och utvecklas som människa. Räcker inte det?

​Sen finns det faktiskt också några som lyckas. Men kläng inte så hårt i din dröm. Se det som en lek. En lek där du utforskar olika sätt att få ägna dig åt den utan att drunkna i besvikelser längs vägen. Lev din dröm så att drömmen fortfarande ger dig energi.

I often find when I fall in love that it's like lightening an electric power plant. You go in and push these handles to the top one by one and all of a sudden the whole building lightens up. When you are in love you are like one of these electric power plants. You are full of energy and you are buzzing like crazy. There is nothing in the world that can stop you. Your power is so strong that you can light up all the people around you just by them being in your presence - connected to your power plant. Your energy is powerful! 

It's a bit like getting pregnant. This tiny little seed and egg meet and all of a sudden there is an explosion of processes lighting up. Cells are being built, hormones are rushing and blood is taking different routes. Heart, brain and livers are being created. All is growing and the expectations are high. You envision a whole new life, a whole new roadmap. Your job is affected, your body is affected, your emotions are affected. You dream about a future with this little new person who a minute ago did not even exist. At least not in you.

You start dreaming about prams, kindergartens and what books you are going to read to this little person. You see pregnant bellies all around and you fantasize of what holidays you will take, what he or she will look like. What interests the baby will have and what his first words will be. Your whole perspective changes. it is fulfilling, glorious and so dreamy. You are like that power plant, buzzing and cooking and you are high on endorphins. You can solve any problem and you are vibrant. Your life is new. Your future is new. 

In this two scenarios you are so full of energy and it is such a magical place to be in. At the same time it is so draining. Your whole world has changed and you find yourself painting a completely new picture, you are being more creative than ever before - and scared shitless at the same time. It is giving you energy but at the same time you are losing energy. It is rewarding and oh so scary at the same time. Antipole. It's giving you so much energy but at the same time it is taking a lot.

Some nights you can't sleep because you are so buzzing and electric from carrying all this energy. In the pregnant state even your body is getting heavy. In the in-love-state your power plant is so fulfilling but at the same time oh-so draining. It is some seriously heavy shit to carry. So many dreams, hopes, visions in one bag. You carry them all. You hold all that buzzing energy and it is a blessing and a curse. And at times you are wondering if you are losing your mind.

Then one day. The power plant is shut down. All of the power is gone, the dreams, the hopes, the ideas. The future of romantic visions and travels are gone. The baby decided to leave. You have a miscarriage. It is only a lump of flesh that leaves your body - but in reality it is so much more. It is a whole envisioned future. A life. A life where all the bits in it are shut down. Forever.

So you stand there with an empty bag and wonder. What now?

You stand in front of a canvas that was so full of vibrant colors which now is plain white. Your pallet lies on the floor. The brushes next to it, but you have energy no more. You are completely drained. 

Yes you have the possibility to paint a different picture, but where do you start? What color, what shape, what type of canvas. a big one, small one, round one. All is void.

Recognize the scenario? Yes we've all been there.

I love being in love. It is en exhilarating feeling and experience. But I often wonder about the human obsession with it. How often we talk about it, dream about love and search for love. Most of our awaken time is spent on defining, creating, wondering, crying, laughing and dissecting the  facetts of love. We put so much energy into it.

Of course there is a need for a relationship to move from in-love to love. To stabilize, to grow and deepen. But still...

I look around me and most people, as far as I can see, seem discontent in their current relationships, sadly. Even more so with the previous one. So why do we put so much energy into it? Yes we are all human beings with a need for closeness, affection and a purpose. We need context, to belong. But why is it so hard to make love work in our favour? I know I still haven't figured it out.

Is it the search, the wonder and the longing that is the whole point?

Currently I am not pregnant or live in a power plant. Instead i have what I consider an oil lamp. it is beautiful, it is alone and it is powerful. Its flame is powerful, sharp and consistent. It is not buzzing with energy, though at times it is, but not like a power plant. Instead it is poignant and dignified. It is secretly trenchant and forceful. But it does burn steady. As long as I keep refilling the oil. I can turn it up or down according to my own rhythm. And it is easy to carry. it is light and powerful at the same time. Sharp. Tranquil. Happy.

I like my oil lamp. It gives me so much energy and focus to build up my dream life. It supports me in the way I wish to live right now. But I can't help but wonder, is there more? Something other than a power plant or an oil lamp? I thought perhaps I would've figured it out by now. But I guess that is the whole point.

Perhaps it's like the cliché: it is not a goal it's a journey.

What are your thoughts on love?

To meditate is so much more than simply sitting still and closing your eyes. Yes in a way it's all there is, but it is much more beneficial than it might seem.

When we disconnect our brain for a few minutes and instead open our hearts, we can truly look inside ourselves and see new things. Hear our true voice and feel what we really feel.

Some people have trouble sitting down relaxing. That's why I love walking meditations so much. One of my friends Jörgen Tranberg just released a new set of meditations called 7 Walking Meditations which are truly great.

The meditations are based on a unique interaction between the emotional and the physical body, both are equally important for you to be able to feel good. He has also created a background music with different frequencies because the brain and the body are affected by sound frequencies.

These meditations are based on science, psychology and research.

You can truly experience transformation when meditating. And when you combine walking, music and meditations there is no end to the possibilities. :)

You can experience the healing at all levels through the unconditional universal heart. The universal space through all the cells. You can experience the depth of your original source. The highest level of consciousness and visit the place where everything is.

​How is that for a trip!?

Music has always been an important part of my life. As a child I took piano lessons, guitar lessons and I sang in various choirs. I performed and I went to a music school for several years. 

It was the singing that really got to me. Preferably in a big choir in a big old church where the tones resonate with all breathing entities in that room.

There is something extraordinary about standing in the midst of a huge crowd of beautiful voices which echoes all around you. Voices ascend, tones mount and sopranos, altos, tenors and all harmonies fill you up - inside and out.

"Music is God's little reminder that there's something else besides us in this universe; harmonic connection between all living beings everywhere, even the stars." - Robin Williams

Music was such a big part of my life, for so many years, that at a certain stage, it had to stop. I was fed up.

For years I didn't pick up an instrument what-so-ever. I didn't sing a single note. At weddings or other church occasions I squirmed when having to. 

I tried singing on a couple of occasions both in a choir and in a duet, but no.

When I had kids I was fed up with noises altogether. I stopped listening to the radio.

At first I wasn’t paying much attention to this change. It was a natural process. 

But as the years went by, I felt this void, something was missing.

And so I sent out a wish - out into the universe: "show me the music – once again!"

I knew I needed to bring it back into my life but there was no rush. It would come to me at the right time.
And I knew I wanted to sing in a small group of music loving peoples, preferably in harmonies.

But the years went by and nothing happened. And at times I was surprised. Where was my music?

But just before Christmas last year, I happened to sit in a car, with some wonderful women. And as the talking, laughing and giggling went on; we realized we had a shared interest: music.

And there it was.

I had found my soulgroup of music loving people.

And the dreaming took off. We pictured ourselves on a stage in front of lots of people. We dreamt and we played with it.

We met, we sang and we practiced (and giggled). We kept dreaming of that stage performance, and we even composed our own song.

And in March this year, it was time. Pure Cor was ready and we sang on a stage in front of 300 people (and another 1000 online).

I don’t want to save the world

I don’t want to be 6-figure-successful

I don’t want to run a 1 million projects

I don’t want to upshift

I don’t want to write a cook book

​I don't want to become a Youtube celeb

I’m surrounded by people and social media telling me to work, to improve, to grow, to build something, to fight, to gain, to compete, to always aim for more. For bigger, broader and better. Dream big, make a change, save the world!

But what if we don't want to?

In my confusion with what is me and what is everyone else I do have 1 million projects going on at once. But sometimes I wonder why. What is pushing me to keep on doing this?

I look at others bragging about their 6-figure businesses, how they grew from small to big. How they started with nothing but two hands and a at best a computer (usually a Mac). And at times I am jealously wondering – how do they do it?

What if we don't want to, need to, wish to. Are we lazy? What if I just want to sit under a palm tree and sip on a cocktail?!

I will probably never save thousands of children from trafficking, become a famous yoga teacher, run several marathons in every capital or in the desert. I will never tour the world as a famous rock star, create a fund-raising community and speak to thousands of people at once on how to save the world.

I will never rescue pandas, tigers or whales (unless it's from the comfort of my computer).

I will never learn how to cook raw food and then write a fabulous cook book about it with glossy pics of carrots that I have grown in my own garden.

I will never have a clean home with fancy furniture from Svenskt Tenn. My nails have not seen a french manicure for many years and my hair is at its best chopped off at the local drop-in hairdresser place.

I am not, however, any less happier.

The only thing that makes me unhappy is when I think I am not good enough. When I compare myself and think this old soul won't do. Cause it does.

Instead I do what I do because I love it.

I sing, not for the sake of being famous, but because it’s my passion. I write blog posts and books, because it's my soul speaking and I can't get it to shut up. I teach dreaming and living soulfully to groups because it is in my nature I can't help myself and no it doesn’t make me rich at all. I travel because it is my spirit’s journey.

I work out – not to become a triathlete but to feel good. I meditate and do yoga not to be trendy, but because my body yearns for it. I give money to charity because others do fund-raising so well. I speak to small groups because it's where I am comfortable and it is where my heart is at the mo.

I do what I do because it's my life and I need my soul to sing at this very level and this is my (current) life song.

​What is your life song? How do you sing it and what is your happy-level? I'm sure it is just perfect. Just for you. Right where you are now. And if it's not - you have the prerogative to change it. Any time you like.

"On a deeper level you are already complete. When you realize that there is playful, joyous energy behind what you do" - Eckart Tolle

There is a lot of talk about creating your happy life these days. I know, I talk about it too. I even teach it. 

Just dream it and you can get it. Just work hard enough and you will fulfill all your dreams. Get the right education, do your exercises, take the right course or self-improvement plan and your life will vibrate in 7 different colours. If it doesn’t work, it’s your own fault. Fake it til you make it.

Law of attraction works in a flash and if it doesn't- you are doing it wrong. You are not letting go, you are not creating your vision board right. You haven't prayed hard enough and you haven’t wished in the "right" way. Perhaps you clinged on to your wish too tight? 

Perhaps you need to be better, cleverer, wiser, truer, freer, looser?

Perhaps you need to let go, need to work harder or need to do it the other way around.

Perhaps healing and kinesiology work for most people – but not for you?

Are you one of those people who still have a backache after several sessions at the acupuncture clinic? And money always flow out of your hands?

Is that the case?

I believe sometimes we simply have to let go. We simply have to be sad, have a back ache, be miserable and just cry. Hide in a cave for a while and simply be with it. Well, we don't have to - but we have to...

Yes it is no fun whatsoever. But it is what it is.

If you're in a miserable state, perhaps you'll learn from it, perhaps you won’t. Perhaps you'll come out at the other end a better person, perhaps you won't.

Sometimes life simply sucks whether it is your fault or not.

Yes there are several friends, preachers, laws and techniques out there to help us, to guide us, to lift us. And all the believers out there will tell you that their therapy is the best and it “aaaalways works for them”. Adding to your guilt when it doesn’t work for you.

But sometimes we are simply not there in mind and heart to receive it. Simple as that.

Or perhaps you are looking too hard for a "result".

The best thing you can do in that situation is to accept it as it is. Sit with it. Be with it and stop blaming yourself. Follow your rhythm. Cause you, and only you – know best.

And do you know what – it’s ok.

I am currently really sad. Really sad. My dad died a few months ago. And no matter what I do to cheer myself up, it doesn’t work. It simply doesn’t. And trust me – I have tried and I have all the techniques available to me that you can dream of. I have lots of friends with good good advice and they all reach out to help me. And I love them for it. But right now. I just need to be sad.

And yes I know that people far worse off than me managed to turn lives around. But that is them.

And so I am. Simply am. I go about my daily life and cut down on all the unnecessary chores and missions. I manage. But I am glum, blue and downright miserable.

But I allow myself to be here.

Because I follow my rhythm.

And I know my rhythm will bring me up one day. It will even vibrate in 7 different colours. But until I’m there I won’t push it.

I will be me in all the colours there is.

Have you reflected on 2015. Was it a turbulent and eventful year? Chaos that needed to be aired?

Or was it a non-event of a year. Sleepier than usual?

How many of your goals and dreams did you achieve?

What are your thoughts on 2016?

Are you worried that history will repeat itself again next year or are you simply happy with what you’ve achieved and wish to achieve even more?

Good!

Then these easy-to-follow steps will help you along the way.

But first. Let’s reflect on the fact that we sometimes find it hard to believe in ourselves.

When you start dreaming about what it is you want to bring into your life. What you want to experience, your dreams and wishes, at first you might actually feel a bit unsure of what it is you truly want. It is as if you are scouring and searching for ideas.

Ideas then start to take shape in your mind and when you think about them your heart starts singing. You get this tingling sensation in your stomach.

That’s what you should aim for.

Your next step would naturally be to start talking to people about your dreams. And this is where it might get a bit tricky. Some people worry about you, and some people don’t believe in your dreams. Some are even jealous and will do all in their power to stop you from reaching your dreams.

If you have dreams you believe in – only speak to people who will support you. It is hard enough as it is to convince yourself. You need on cheerers! Don’t allow yourself to be affected by negative energies.

If you are unsure and need a second opinion – fine. But choose your advisors carefully.

Now let’s get to work:

1. Think about all the things you are grateful for in 2015 and list them.
2. Write down all the things you need to let go of from this year. Then let them go. Don’t let them hold on to you.
3. Write down all the things you wish to experience in 2016. Pick five.
4. Break them down into achievable steps.
5. Write them in your calendar.

Voila! You will have a very successful 2016!

Good luck!