I’d love to make homemade juice with no sugar added and never let my kids indulge in sweets and bad habits.
I’d love to sit around and read bed time stories every night and always remember to brush their little teeth.
I’d love to know exactly when my kids are ill so that kinder garden teacher doesn’t have to call me and say "little one just vomited all over the floor today" and "didn’t you notice she was feeling ill this morning"?
I’d love to bake creative cakes in beautiful colours, shaped like the latest figure they like at the moment (I wish I knew what figure they like at the moment).
I’d love to create wonderful magical birthday parties where every child is happy and rosy and playing and laughing.
I’d love to be able to support my kids with their homework and know exactly what kind of mathematics technique they are using in schools today (and know how to use it).
I would also love to have political and societal discussions with the older ones and endless talks into the night about the meaning of life.
I’d love to chat about the kids’ latest misunderstandings with their friends and hear them say: “mum it is great talking to you because you always have time for us and understand us so well”.
I’d love to say “no we don’t play computer games in this house", "I never use the dvd as a baby sitter" and "I never let them eat in front of the telly”.
And if they once in a blue moon get to eat sweets, we always run to the tooth brush and brush those little cavities
I’d love to say "every summer we spend our days in nature, we go swimming and no tv-games are on whatsoever".
I’d love to say “Ipod – what is that? My kids play with organic-nopoison-wooden toys and with their friends”.
I’d love to have time to teach all my children, with great patience, how to ride a bike, the names of the star signs, how to ski, how letters form words, what the flowers are called and how we can create world peace.
I’d love to say and do all of this, but can we for one minute just stop and let each other not to be so perfect all the time?
Yes, I admit it, my kids sometimes go to bed without brushing their teeth, they also sit hour after hour in front of the tv when I simply have to finish that report, because that is the easiest way to get it done.
Yes I have tried to give them paint, crafty stuff, pearls and other forms of entertainment, but it does not always work. I sometimes take the easy way out. I do.
I don’t always feed them organic home grown food, quite often they get processed food, because I simply dislike cooking and I don’t have time to roll meatballs from fresh meat.
I also let them stay indoor a whole day when it is raining, because I don’t like getting wet and cold.
I do all that – I admit it.
Can we please stop making each other feel guilty about all this and instead applaud each other for being such wonderful
I think most parents today are under such pressure that we need to step back and let some easy-way-out problem-sorting be ok.
As long as we are generally happy and healthy - children and grown-ups.
I quite often get positive feedback from teachers and other parents who happen to spend time with my kids. So I must be doing something right? I regularly ask my kids if they are happy, and most of the time the answer is yes.
I think as long as we try to do our best that should be good enough.
I have also set up some ground rules that I try to follow (I said try):
1. We help each other around the house.
2. We respect and are kind to ourselves and to others.
3. We eat sort of regularly.
4. We make lots of healthy smoothies to make up for bad food habits.
5. Reasonable bed time (unless we feel the urgent need to watch a really good football game, movie or cuddle in bed).
6. We brush teeth as often as we can (and take baths, brush hair, take vitamins, cut nails, do laundry, clean house).
7. School and its rules are fairly important.
8. Reasonable digital-time (then again, reasonable to whom? I know there are recommendations around, but these recommendations don’t take into account full-time-working single mothers with 3 kids).
9. Spoiling kids to ease quilty conscience is sometimes ok.
10. Cuddles are mandatory.
There. Use them if you like. But please let us all be human. Don’t be so hard on yourself.
You are doing brilliantly just the way you are and so am I.