Alarm clock rings
Getting out of bed
Do not want to leave bed
Warm feet against cold wooden floor
Quickly pull them back under cover
Eyelids want to close
Thinking: Is this it?
Is this it?
The child cries, calling me
Pushing myself out of bed
Wiping tears off cheek of small child, explaining the dream
After quick shower: rapidly creating 3 breakfasts
Nagging about eating breakfast
Nagging about getting dressed
Nagging about brushing teeth
Nagging about packing school bag
But do not nag too much because then little one breaks down
Putting on mascara - quickly
On the way out: did I eat breakfast?
Running to preschool
Someone forgot gloves today
Running even faster back home again
Door unlocked, found a meaning in the meaningless.
Sweaty in suit jacket
Old jam stain on suit jacket
Finally at preschool
Trying to smile at the staff
Me not stressed
Calm and peaceful
Little one clings onto me
Doesn't want me to go
Neither do I.
Bending her arms off my neck
Waving to the big round teary filled eyes
My eyes fill too
Running to bus
Tear on tights
May be covered by boot if lucky
Bus just pulled out
Late for work
Did I eat breakfast?
Inbox: 91 unread e-mails
Respond to 7 before first meeting
Colleagues with glazed eyes enter the meeting room
One is happy
Have missed to hand in report
Am usually on top of things, in control
Jam stain on jacket flashes its evil eye at me
Did I or didn't I eat breakfast?
Sitting in front of computer
Googling on trip to Thailand
Long white sandy beaches sneer at me
Thinking of the 2 weeks of rain on the long-awaited vacation that just passed
Thailand, is that life?
Where is my life?
Can all of us live in Thailand?
Is that the answer?
Can everyone work and live wherever they want?
Awakened from my dream by next meeting
Colleague is standing by my desk
Trying to practice mindfulness at next meeting
Should work out too...
Guilt - my best friend
Yoga, is that the answer?
The report, how could I forget?
Mindfulness right, someone speaks, do I listen?
What is the meaning of life?
Thai lunch today at local restaurant
Naan bread on Wednesday
Is this life?
A different country each lunch
Someone says: Live instead
Hello? Are you in there?
Where am I?
Where do I live and who am I?
Now I'm at a Thai Restaurant
A small piece of Thailand in my stomach
I chew slowly and enjoy it
Not to dwell
No longing but living
I'll be and I'll live
I walk out into the rain and +4 degrees and I think to myself:
I'm me, I'm alive and I am well
I create my own life
My own truth
My own Thailand
I live in a country of rain, snow and darkness
But I always have a Thailand inside
An oasis to which I can travel whenever I want
I have decided
My life is now and it's good
This is my New Years Resolution.